Antoine and I headed for a short trip to Rwanda. The bus ride from Kampala to Kigali took 10 hours and when we reached the boarder I got the visa free of charge and Antoine was almost denied entry. Apparently he had to fix a visa in advance and pay 60 dollars for it whilst I got away with not paying a penny since I have a Swedish passport. Do not know really why but apparently there is an agreement between certain countries, and the Netherlands is not one of them. Like I often tell Antoine, it is beneficial in more than several ways to be Swedish J The man behind the counter who had the decision of entries in his hands was kind enough to let Antoine through for this time, but he had to pay 60 dollars. When we entered Rwanda it was a very different scenario compared to Uganda. Rwanda is very green and has several high hills. I was just picturing the film Hotel Rwanda in my head. The scenario and the atmosphere brought my thoughts back to the genocide. Having a degree in Human rights and having the topic of the genocide in Rwanda often addressed in class was an extra motivation for choosing to go to Rwanda. Antoine called Rwanda two faced and this I found a good resemblance to what it actually is. The consequences of the genocide was still in the air since it was not a long time ago it occurred, however there was an unwillingness to speak of it. We stayed at a motel which was in good shape and the manager was very friendly. We asked him a few questions about the genocide and a certain amount of resilience was detected. I later found out that they prefer not speaking to much of what happened, but at the same time they find it important not to forget the past in order for it not to occur again. Their eagerness to move on I think is the reason for them not wanting to dwell in discussions of the past, but as an outsider the knowledge of the past is of great interest, especially when told in person. With that said, we also did not manage to engage in fluent conversations with many Rwandans since they prefer speaking French than English.
We went to the genocide museum. Outside were small gardens each garden with a meaning. For example the rose garden resembled each woman who had been murdered in the genocide. The fountain resembled a now united Rwanda and the beautiful meanings went on. The burial place had over 500 000 corps lying there, but still many bodies are missing. Inside the museum the story was told of how the idea of genocide began from the Belgian colonists separating Rwandans into groups of Tutsis and Hutus. Which later lead to the devastating genocide in Rwanda. The worst part is that the world looked by in silence without acting upon the brutality that was occurring. One million Tutsis (and some Hutus who did not wish to murder Tutsis) had been murdered within three months. They had been brutally killed with machetes, buried alive, raped (many of the women raped have HIV today. This is used as a method of slowly eliminating a race) forced to kill family members, and much more of the worst things you can imagine. One room was in specific very heartbreaking, a room with pictures of only children who had been murdered. Below the pictures, their names, age, their likings, their last words and finally how they had been murdered was stated. Many visitors could not resist the tears when seeing this. It was terrible. I truly can not understand the cruelty that mankind is capable of.
Other than the genocide museum Antoine and I just enjoyed each other’s company. We ate out in different restaurants both Chinese and Indian food, and I was happy to eat something else than beans. J Ever since I came to Uganda it has been beans every day. Don’t get me wrong I love beans in all shapes and colors but after three months my taste buds are yearning for something else. When we returned to Kampala we spent a night at a hotel and had a full day of just walking around in town and relaxing with a fresh smoothie in the hot sun. Then we met up with the Karlsson family and went to do some exercise and take a dip in the pool. The day before Antoine had to leave for Amsterdam we decided to go and play some foot ball. Elin, robin, Antoine and I went in search of a ground to play on, and shortly we were accompanied by several African kids. The African kids were running around in hagged clothes and were barefoot but had an incredible stamina. They could go on playing forever. It was a lot of fun.
Last night Antoine left for Amsterdam and I myself have only five days more here with the Karlsson family in Uganda. The last month here has mainly been about travelling and very little effort has been put into my research but I am not concerned. I know the stress of getting everything done will set in when I arrive in Europe as the same old patterns return. However I will try my best to maintain some of that “care free- Africa mood” I have managed to establish within myself here. I want to maintain that sense of peace and awareness. We complain about a whole lot of meaningless things back home which is not comparable to the concerns people have here, yet we are the ones dealing with a lot of depression. Not that depression does not exist here in Africa, however when people need to attend to their basic needs like getting food on the table, they tend not to dwell on emotions but more on practicalities. This is something I can apply to my own life. I am a very emotional being and at times the empathy I feel can be overwhelming. I start thinking and questioning a lot. I am grateful for this since it makes my life colorful and I see several shades of green leaves on a tree than only one, but at times just acknowledging the presence of the tree can be enough than going into deeper thought. It sounds very abstract, I know, but simply the fact of just focusing more on the actions than the constant thought behind it is something some people can adhere to more, whilst others need to apply the opposite. To actually give some things a thought before they act.
These three and a half months here have gone by so fast and back home I think many of my friends would feel, oh you are already back! However when you are abroad in an environment unlike your own and each day you learn something new about another culture the impressions are several. My time here even though it has been short has brought me so close to the Karlsson family whom I adore. It has brought me closer to my walk with God, and a lot of questions have been answered. It has given me knowledge about ADRA and has also opened up doors for me to take a step and maybe work within the NGO world (The outcome of where and when is yet uncertain) and finally this experience has brought me closer to Africa, and Uganda in particular. Uganda has given me a greater understanding and acceptance of life. This world is beautiful with its colorful people, fruits, animals, and nature. However it is temporary state. We never know if we will be here tomorrow or not. Death is a daily happening in Uganda as mentioned before. This has made me understand that it is not a matter of how long we live our life but it is a matter of how we live our life, and the quality put into it. To be good to one another and to truly live each day as it were the last. I speak of the obvious, but I do not mean knowing it because we all do know this, but really letting this understanding become a part of your heart and being. This is not a sad acceptance but an extremely liberating one. I try to wake up each day and say, God thank you for blessing me with a new day and let’s give it a new try to be as good as I can be today. When I was in Amsterdam I focused very much on yesterdays and tomorrows and not the actual today and I see very many people back home having the same mindset. I might fall into old patterns and mindset when I get back home, but my identity is a collection of my experiences. And what is an experience if I do not learn from it? So hopefully I can apply what I have learnt here in my everyday life wherever I am. With that said I am grateful for my time in Africa, and my heart tells me I will be back. J But for now See you back in Europe!
